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me and him

Today is exactly ten months and ten days since I got married with Erwin. There are still many times before us to share together. And so far, I come to the conclusion that characteristically Erwin and I are really, really different persons. Below are the reasons why I concluded so.

ERWIN
- does not come naturally with music;
- comes naturally of being a leader;
- a thinking person; before he acts, he will think about the whole scheme of his action;
- a better person to get acquainted with new people;
- value goodies from the economical point of view;
- prefers to watch epic and science fiction movies;
- does not like reading books;
- does not really care about outfits he wears;
- If finding some difficulties, he tries to find any way to solve them;
- likes to play games that need strategic and brainwave, such as Sudoku, Magic

The Gathering, Rammiking, etc;
- playing games for winning;
- can carry on doing something in front of computers for hours;
- any food will do;
- can understand something difficult and confusing easily;
- a more reality person;
- live for tomorrow;
- a sensitive person;
- innovative;
- carefully look out of what he does and speaks;
etc.

JESSIE
- comes naturally with music;
- comes naturally of being an entertainer;
- a spontaneous person; she does not think much before she acts;
- a better person to maintain good relationship with friends;
- value goodies from the style and popularity point of view;
- prefers to watch cartoon movies;
- loves reading books;
- cares about outfits she wears;
- if finding some difficulties, she lets the other people solve them for her;
- likes to play games that only need some lucks, such as the Game of Life, etc;
- playing games for fun;
- can carry on doing something in front of computers only for a few hours;
- not any food will do;
- takes time to understand something difficult and confusing;
- a more dreamy person;
- live for today;
- an inattentive person;
- creative;
- carelessly look out of what she does and speaks;
etc.

I can spend another day to make the list of our differences longer, but surely I do not want to, thank you very much.

Sometimes, I am annoyed with our differences. I do have desire to do something we really enjoy together. Apparently, only one thing we can enjoy together. Theater. And we have nothing to do with that here, so….

However, I find that it is far more interesting to have a typical different partner than alike. You can complete each other. What I cannot do is covered with him and otherwise. More than ten months, I realize that we influence each other and it will take another long list if you want to know.

Just like the quote we took for our wedding invitation:

He was my cream, and I was his coffee. And when you poured us together, it was something.
-Josephine Baker-

Cappuccino will be very delicious if two different ingredients are blended together.

Friday, 17 November 2006
2:27 pm

where is the baby???

An empty stage. No settings at all. Beyond space and time.

A man appears on the stage. He looks confused seeking for something. His eyes go to every single spot that is possible to find what he is looking for. Another man crops up. He is sweeping the floor and looks to enjoy what he is doing. Suddenly the first man gets his attention. The second man approaches the first man and goes, “Are you looking for something?” “I’m looking for a baby,” answers the first man. He still looks confused and keeps looking to everywhere. “Did you lose your baby?” asks the second man. He has stopped sweeping the floor. “It’s not my baby,” says the first man. The second man looks puzzled. “You are looking for the baby that’s not yours?” As though not listening to the second man, the first man goes, “Last time I saw it here.” “Ok, then,” said the second man decidedly. “I’ll help you looking for the baby. Is it a baby boy or a baby girl?” “A baby boy.” “How old is he?” “He’s just born.” The second man, again, looks extremely annoyed and puzzled. “He’s just born and then lost??” The first man, however, does not pay attention with the second man’s perplexity. The second man does not give up. He follows the strange man who’s looking for the baby and asks again, “Is he lost with his mother?” “No,” answers the man. The second man gets angry and more annoyed, “Do you think I’m idiot? Are you going to tell me that a newly born baby can run away by himself??” “I thought I saw him here last time.” “When did you see him last time?” “A year ago.” “A year ago?!?!?” “Yes.” “And why on earth do you just look for him now??” The first man does not answer him. He just keeps looking for the baby. The second man approaches him, touches his forehead and goes, “You’re sick, man. I’m sorry but I cannot help you. I have so much things to do, cannot bother myself with freak like you.” The second man leaves the man who is still busy looking for the baby, while the other man turns up furiously talking on the phone. “I told you yesterday we need the money to provide dinner at our Christmas party! Don’t you dare to cut it out! I certainly don’t want to have a Christmas party without big meals! (inaudible) I don’t want to know about it! If you need some money, you can have some of the money we provide for that charity. (inaudible) What? Do not touch the money for the decoration either! Are you insane? I want the most splendid decoration ever for the party! Absolutely with the Christmas tree and the manger! Alright, alright, I will take care of it!” He hangs up the phone and still looks furious. The first man approaches the furious man and asks, “Do you see a baby?” The furious man looks at the first man as if he is an alien. “A baby?” “Yes, I thought I saw it here last time.” The furious man looks more irritated, “No. Sorry, but I’m a very busy man, looking for a baby as well and definitely have no time to help you.” The first man looks excited. “We can look for the baby together! You can look for it in that side, I will look for it in this side, see? If you find it first, just shout and I’m coming.” The furious man goes maddened, “Listen, I am now a chief of the committee of Christmas party at my church. I am very busy. I do not have time to help you looking for your d***** baby, so….” “I believe you just said that you are also looking for the baby?” “Yes, but I am looking for the fake one, you see, for the Christmas party at my church. Sorry, I’m in a hurry.” Then, away the furious man goes leaving the first man confused. Suddenly behind the first man, a dandy man turns up and greets him very politely. “Good afternoon, gentleman.” The first man jumps and looks extremely surprised. “You give me such a fright,” says him. “I’m sorry to bother you, but I heard you are looking for a baby.” The first man excitedly answers, “Yes! Have you found the baby I have been looking for?” “It depends on what kind of baby you are looking for.” “(confusedly) What do you mean?” “I have many different kinds of babies. Some of them are made in Australia, some are made in China, the others are made in Japan and also in US. What kind of baby would you like? I certainly have….” “I’m looking for a baby who’s just born….” “Sure, sure. No problems. What size do you need? XS? S? I even can give you TripleXL if you want. Or if you would love to see the ancient one, I have one which they said it used to belong to Queen Victoria long time ago, and the price…, well, ehm! a bit more expensive, of course.” “Ehm…, but….” “If you want a cheap price but still have a good quality, you might be interested with those which are made in China.” “Ehm, but pardon me….” “Or would you love a more sensational one? They sent me the latest products yesterday. Coming from Europe. A baby who can sing Shakira’s songs and dance the way she does. Isn’t it brilliant? I can fix up the best price for you, of course.” The first man begins to be annoyed with the dandy man and is leaving him eventually, “Sorry, but I’m in a hurry.” However, the dandy man does not give up so easily. He tries to reach the first man and says, “Alright, as it’s Christmas time, I can give you the very best price you’ve ever had. You can have another one for free if you buy one. Only during Christmas, isn’t it great?” “I’m really sorry, but I do not have time for this….” The dandy man then gives the first man his card and says, “Alright, this is my card, never hesitate to call me if you change your mind. See you around!” The first man feels very relieved as the dandy man leaves him. He continues to look for the baby and meets a woman. “Good day, Ma’am,” greets him. “Good day, Sir.” “I am looking for a baby. Do you see one?” “A baby?” “Yes, he’s just born.” The woman suddenly gives him her smile. “I know. You’re looking for a baby who’s lost last year, are you not?” “How do you know?” “I used to be like you, Sir. Every year I have to go looking for the baby. I was looking everywhere, but once I found, I lost him again. Found and lost, found and lost. Just like that. I was getting tired, then.” The first man looks very sad. “I’m also getting tired looking for him, Ma’am. Nobody helps me. They mind their own businesses. The man who just swept the floor said I was freak looking for a baby that’s lost a year ago.” The woman laughs. “I used to be called freak as well, Sir, but not anymore.” “(amazed) How can you do that? What did you do so you cannot lose the baby anymore?” “Easy, Sir. I keep him.” “You keep him?” “(composedly) Yes. I keep him in a very secure place. Every time I need him, I see him, feel comfortable and keep him again.” “(confusedly) Just keep him, Ma’am?” “Yes, so I do not need to look for him again and again, do I? They no longer call me crazy if I look for the baby every year.” The first man leaves the woman thinking about her suggestion before an old man greets him. “Are you looking for the baby, son?” “(surprisedly) Yes, Sir. I was looking for the baby when I met a lady, who suggests me to keep the baby once I find him so that I do not need to look for him again every year. I..I’m getting tired to do it.” “(wisely) Many have lost the baby every year. Some, then, are getting tired and too lazy to look for him again. And there will be times when they no longer seek the baby and replace him with the other babies. They never know this baby is irreplaceable.” “Have you ever lost the baby?” “I have spent my whole life losing the baby many times. I never feel tired to look for him because I believe the baby will find me first.” “I don’t understand.” “You will, son. Trust me. It will be the baby who finds you first and does not let you seek him any longer.” After saying so, the old man leaves the first man perplexed. In a few seconds, the first man leaves the stage. Only his voice is left, “Do you see a baby?”


The story above is adapted from a script play that I wrote weeks ago. Inspired by Erwin’s idea, I meant every single sentence I wrote down. And yes, it is true. We only seek Baby Jesus at Christmas while the other time, we do not really care about The Little Baby who was born two thousands years ago to save our lives. Sometimes, I notice people do not care about The Baby anymore. Some uses Christmas for their own benefits, such as business, splendid celebration, etc. The others think that they can seek Jesus only when they need to. I myself sometimes fall to every character I have made in the play. Sometimes I become the person who does not care at all with The Baby. Sometimes I become the person who uses The Baby for my own benefit. Another time I am only too absorbed with splendid celebration and forget the meaning of it. One thing for sure, I will never get tired to seek the Baby if I feel I lose Him. I believe what the old man believes – that The Baby will find me first long before I really find Him. He loves me.


Tuesday, 14 November 2006
12:57 am

PS 1: Dedicated to those who are still seeking the Baby. Keep seeking for it will never be too in vain.
PS 2: Thanks to Erwin, my beloved partner for inspiring me to write down this story.

to: my dude


At my home, comfortably warm sitting before our old PC, showering outside with a bit of ray.

Supporting companies: a cup of hot cappuccino and CD of Mozart.


To : my baby (who’s turning 5 months this week)
Inside mummy’s tummy

Dear my baby,

Hey, how’re you, Dude? Mummy guesses you are fine inside mummy’s tummy, eh? You’ve been kicking and tickling your mum’s tummy today. It’s ok, though. Your mum’s enjoying it because it means that you’re healthy. So keep kicking and tickling unless you feel you want to sleep, anyway. You need a lot of time to sleep, of course.

Now, Dude, let’s play a game called ‘do you know?’. Because I am almost sure the place where you’re living know gives is way too warm, too exclusive for your own. That’s why I want you to know what’s happening outside your world, and the most important thing, what’s my feelings over it.

Dude, do you know that last Friday was the most incredible day of my life? It was because I saw the glimpse of you for the first time. I saw that you are beautifully growing inside me. Yes, you have been growing very well. And nothing but that could make me a lot happier.

Dude, do you know that you already have five fingers each in your left and right small hands and five toes each in your left and right small feet? You were even sucking your thumb when we’re peeping into your world.

Dude, do you know that you were actively moving around when the nurse tried to show us all of your anatomy? And I am proud to have an energetic baby like you. I am really.

Dude, do you know that we actually did not really care to have you as a baby boy or a baby girl? As long as you are healthy, growing very well, that’s enough for us. However, yes, we are way too happy to know your sex even though we’re not ready to let our family and friends know about it yet.

Dude, do you know that when we got the pictures of you, your daddy suspects that you will have the shape of my mouth? It is too early to do it, isn’t it, Dude? You still have four months to grow fast.

Dude, do you know that your mummy cried when she was seeing the glimpse of you through the screen for the first time? She was too sober to realize that you are growing beautifully well inside her tummy. Come on, do not laugh at her, as you have given her an amazing experience to become a mum.

Dude, do you know that your poor daddy still cannot hear nor feel the way you move inside my tummy? He tries to hear you everyday but maybe you enjoy kicking and tickling your mum’s tummy too much, don’t you?

Dude, do you know that your grandma teased your mum about you becoming a football player just because I told her you like kicking my tummy during these past two weeks? Haha, I hope you become a great musician or something so while your daddy hopes you become a scientist or something so. Well, it is really about a matter of time. You have enough time to decide what you want to be. And God will help you anyway, Dude. So don’t mind what your parents’ want, but mind your God wants.

Well, now seems your time to have a rest, eh? After kicking and tickling your mum’s tummy? That’s okay. Sleep well and if you think time to kick and tickle your mum’s tummy is on again, I am always ready to play with you.


Love you,
Your mum


Thursday, 2 November 2006
2:00 pm