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never ending story

Watching TV in afternoons has been my habit since I moved here. However, I’m getting bored to choke you all my complaints and gripes about how difficult I am trying to look for job. I just want to believe that soon I will get the most appropriate job in His line.

Anyway, this afternoon I unintentionally watched Oprah Winfrey Show in Channel 10. Being full enough about Commonwealth games (and Australia always won over and over, it’s nearly predictable and not fun anymore) in Channel 9, I found myself sitting in front of the TV showing The Oprah. Guess what? I will not put it down here if the topic is not pretty interesting.

This time, she invited a Greg Something (I can’t remember his complete name, too difficult), who is a co-author of the book entitled “He’s not that into you”. Again, it’s simply about complicated relationship between man and woman (the most interesting topic over the years, all the time!). An attractive woman was presented and she told that she has been five years getting along with her boyfriend. After all, she has a desire to get married with him. She is certain enough that her boyfriend loves her indeed and so does she. Their relationship has been smoothly and perfectly going on. The only problem is: her boyfriend refuses to have engaged with her. She wonders why and she cannot understand him at all.

The Greg deadly questioned her why she would love to get married if they had had a perfect relationship. What’s wrong with the relationship that she specifically wants to convert it into an uncertain relationship so-called marriage? Well, you’re correct. The Greg got the attractive woman there. No answer. No further argument. That’s understandable. If I were her, I precisely could not argue what he claimed.

Now, if I question you (those girls or women who live in Indonesia, specifically), why do you want to get married? Why do you want yourselves engaged if your current relationship with your boyfriend or fiancée or something likely is perfectly smooth? Are you, as a matter of fact, culturally controlled by your surroundings? Are you desperately insisted by your parents or grandparents or family or relatives to get married and then give them the next generation to possess their-great-family name? Are you seriously distracted with the miserable fact that all your friends got married already and haven’t you yet? Then, I am imitating the Greg’s question: what’s wrong with the relationship you’re having that you specifically want to convert your perfect current relationship into an uncertain relationship so-called marriage? Yes, of course, you live in Indonesia, a beautiful and tropical place where your life is not only spotted by people you know but also those you don’t even know – that everyone will scornfully be chitchatting on you just because you are a woman and unmarried and you have been 30+ years old already, for goodness’ sake, what’s wrong with that?

Someone once told me, that indeed, a relationship between man and woman is basically controlled by culture. The difference between the two creatures is mostly acknowledged by culture as well and a small piece of spiritualism. No, I am not blaming your culture (which is obviously also mine) and not having a pity for myself because I have been married already. I am just assuming that the man-and-woman problem will always be a massive problem for the next centuries.

So? To be continued….

Thursday, 23 March 2006
04:44 pm

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